Back in November of 2014, at one the lowest most scary times in my life, I realized something you can only see when you're there. I became, in some strange way, inseparable from the pain I felt. It was so all-encompassing that it was if it was within every cell, affecting my every thought and emotion. At the same time I realized that though I had become this pain, in order to transcend it I needed to also become my own hero. I had to make the choices required to pull myself out of it. An act of will in the face of soul wrenching and visceral pain. I had to be my own hero. I didn't understand where god fit into it all, in that sense I was confused. Spiritually at a loss, though I prayed, I believe in that moment my freewill was staring me in the face and I had to choose to keep going, God was there, but He is not a genie in a bottle. I believe He cared for me and maybe bolstered my strength and kept me on the path but being the hero and the pain was a fact. I made it through, and this was the first song I wrote as I recovered from this time.